1. I don't like the number four. I just feel like its too perfect. its just too even, its too easy to divide, add, and multiply. the idea of having four kids makes me cringe for some reason, irrational? completely. coincidentally michaels favorite number is four, because its so perfect.
2. Im not sure if you are supposed to tear toilet seat covers to make the hole. I used to do it, and then one day i realized that i usually really have to go to the bathroom if i am going in a public place, and i don't have time to individually rip each one. so i just lay it down and go for it. I, of course, thought it was weird that i didn't rip it anymore so i brought it up to my sister and apparently she doesn't rip the thing either, and that it wasn't that uncommon. Maybe the slits are there so it does tear easier when you poo, instead of tearing it before. I don't know what one is socially acceptable. and i dont know if i will ever know.
3. it makes me uncomfortable when there are a group of people out to dinner and multiple people order the same thing. If i am out to dinner and have picked what i want to eat, then hear that someone else is ordering the same thing, i will change it. even if i want that other dish so much more, i change it. my brother is the same way. i have no idea where this came from.
4. i always brush my teeth right before i leave the house. it doesnt matter if i just brushed my teeth an hour before, or if i am just going out to eat. doesnt matter. i always brush my teeth right before i leave.
5. i always have the same routine when i take a shower. i get in, wet my hair, shampoo it, rinse the shampoo, then i squeeze most of the water out of my hair, then i put in conditioner. while the conditioner is still in i wash my body and shave whatever i feel like shaving, (but i do shave my arm pits every shower) then i rinse most my hair and last but not least i wash my face. every single shower.
6. when i am in my car and i have this huge booger in my nose that i have to get i always go through the same dilemma. what am i going to do with the booger after i get it? harvey isnt around so i cant feed it to him... by this point it is too late and the booger is on my finger, so then i wipe it under my seat. and then i feel bad for whoever will own my car in the future because one day they are going to reach under to adjust the seat or feel for the cell phone they just dropped and they will just get a handful of a bunch of crusties. and then i always think that i will clean it all up before i get rid of this car. and i then i laugh at how ridiculous that is. clean my car? me? no thanks. maybe the future driver wont think its my old boogers when they feel it? im a glass half full kind of person
7. whenever i go to the bathroom in a public restroom that is mostly empty i always have the same flashback
...im little (not sure my age) and my parents are watching a movie and on the screen is this woman going in the stall to go to the bathroom, and she sits down to do her business. then you see this creepy ginger guy peek over the edge of the stall with a wire cord, lowers its, and somehow wraps it around her neck and starts to choke her right then and there! that is the only part i remember from the movie, i have no idea what movie this is and i have yet to see it since.
so whenever i go into a stall to do my business i always wonder if there is a creepy ginger guy in the stall next to me, waiting with a cord.
8. i think it is unfair for me to make michael put the toilet seat down after he uses the bathroom. i mean to be fair we both use the bathroom the same amount. couldnt he get mad at me for not leaving it up? not to mention i am completely capable of putting the seat down myself when i have to go, i am in my 20's. frankly i find it selfish when girls get mad about it.
9. when my co workers go to pick up lunch for us and i give them my card to pay for it, i have this irrational fear that it will be declined. even if 2 seconds before i check my account and see that i have plenty of money,even if i know i was paid that day, even if its only a $4 meal, i still have this dark feeling inside. so i choose to hand them my whole wallet, and i then point out which cards they can use just in case it wont go through. i would rather avoid that embarrassment, so i take precautions.
the end
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Hilarious. That's all I got to say :)
ReplyDeleteyou're the best. seriously.
ReplyDeleteHaha Sarah you haven't changed one bit
ReplyDelete